sometimes when you bring the thunder you get lost in the storm
so he went down on me and i thought i heard him say "you're smelly" to my vagina
i got awkward and finally asked him what he said
he actually said "you want some dick?" to my vagina. which is worse? either way he's talking to it
i just saw someone crawling up the stairs to the dorm while screaming "i have the best vagina!"
He said he had to make up a lie of why he couldnt sleep with her. It must really suck to have a sunburned dick.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
remember last year when i left for the bar in flip flops and came back in heels?
it happened again.
I'm using process of elimination to determine which of our neighbors i fucked last night.
Ya. I was the definition of a shit show. I woke up outside my door when my alarm went off
at least i was responsible enough to take off my shoe and throw up in it
there's a barbecue in the shower. I'd like to know who got this to fit inside perfectly. impressive
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh my god what did I do. My hands are scraped, there are pickles on the floor, my clothes are wet, and I don't remember how I get here. Thank you.
I woke up to you singing What Makes You Beautiful and trying to blend an avocado with vodka.
At this point, if I'm not getting fucked by a man in ONLY cowboy boots, it's not worth it.
What is more embarrassing, shitting yourself in Mexico or having sex in a forest preserve with a 19 yr old? This is crucial research.
Two of my roommates are waxing their vaginas in the living room. Can I come smoke?
Drunk purchased a negligee, plan b, keds and Himalayan salt shot glasses.. there’s only one reasonable purchase there, and we both know it’s not the sneakers
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