If one more person calls me a lesbian I am going to have to give you head in public.
i'm half naked talking to a cat. you don't have to justify your life to me.
you left me with this keg alone. this is on your hands
The weekend is off to a good start: she just got into a verbal fight with a hobo. Nearly a fist fight.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
But how will the next generation learn about life choices without a Jersery Shore?
I think I might be harboring a Canadian in my womb.
I have feelings that need drinking.
Well according to all the calls, texts, and Facebook messages, I threw up on you guys last night.
This is a mass text to all my friends. Whoever gets this first, please find me and confiscate my phone immediately. I am far too high to have it. Even if you have to punch me in my face to get it. Otherwise, let the "High While Analyzing Disney Movies" texts begin.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah but sometimes your vagina needs to be fed and when we are drunk we tend to eat junk food
just got permission to expense a nerf gun
YO I WASNT TRYING TO MAKE A PASS AT YOU.... Or Jesus
Would I do it again? Probably not but still,I don't regret a single ratchet thing I've done in college.
Every text my dad sends me is an AA mantra. Might be time to take a look at my life.
I'm literally about to create a tinder account. Just so someone drives me to get food.
Randomize