i just saw my boxers from 2 days ago stuck in a tree 4 miles from my house
O.A.R does not stand for Old Recycled Abortions.
I would give my right arm to go back to college. Or maybe not. Would be kinda hard to pick up guys with one arm. Then again, knowin what I do now...I could take any freshman bithc with only one arm.
i wish that i had sketchier friends so that it would be easier to get drugs
We just got home. I got some malt liqour and a lottery ticket so I'm really doing a lot with my life right now
i was concerned for your health after you took your "last shot" four times...
Seriously? Time stamp. 2:31 AM. And I am taking self potraits with a tree. Betty Ford anyone?
ONE NIGHT STAND. You have 27 minutes before the offer expires, so I suggest you hurry.
Housing came buy and confiscated our shopping cart :(
Call me when you get off. I have stories about black lesbians in jail begging to braid my hair...
I just really need to get the matching flask to go with my pill box. Is this another step towards rock bottom?
So they found him after the wedding still dressed up in his feather boa and top hat passed out in a bush...
She makes margaritas with lemon-lime 5 hour energy..thats brilliant
and you were wondering how she got into Harvard
My life has evolved from screwing randos, ok?
We need a rematch, I think my pussy was on vacation the other night.
Randomize
