More dangerous that a broken heart and a shotgun.
It smells like weed.
We are in Boulder, Everything smells like weed.
I just found out the FDA voted to ban Vicodin, my last connection to this world has been destroyed
where are my pants?
you were passing out with two blankets and the person next to you was cold so you gave him your pants to keep warm
Just had to return the shit I stole from the dining hall, with everyone watching...apparently there ARE consequences for being drunk, coked up and belligerent.
If you're still on campus there's a jack and coke in the bathroom of fondren science Bldg. Too strong to bring to class.
Some rando is vomiting profusely into the garden outside the employee entrance. Where are you when things like this happen to me?
Vomiting outside the employee entrance
I'm eating a piece of cake like an apple. At least my thought process is healthy.
Our neighbors just passed us a blunt from their deck, and are hooking us up.
I just baked them cookies. We're friends now.
I decided tomorrow is going to be great day wether my period likes it or not
Skip school. Seven hour blow job Plus Disney movies. Day of champions
I'm sober. Being kissed by a chick with a llama puppet. Shoot me now.
Did you take the full box of samoas or do I not remember getting baked and eating half a box by myself?
Nice girl until she takes off the fake human suit and shows you the flesh eating demon she truly is
We're going to watch the inauguration and fuck. Or fuck and watch the inauguration, I'm not picky, just get your ass over here by ten.
Randomize
