Whenever he makes me dinner its always mini things.. cheeseburgers, corndogs.. is he preparing me for something?
Dude, just paid my sister in vicodin to go out and buy me a slushie.
I don't think I have ever been told that I am "probably too drunk to pet the stingrays" by a cop before.
I know now the amount of smoke it takes to set off the fire alarm....no longer worried about using the bong...not even close
I would personally love to see the surveillance video of me throwing my stuff inside, peeing on the sidewalk, then crying hysterically when I realized I locked myself out. Again.
Haha, oh man. I'm awake now. Slept in my headdress.
Oh, and i love you too. Im just a selfish dick who had to talk about myself first
Chilling. The soap was talking at one point if I rememeber right...
I have a bruise on dick where you tried to "high five" me.
at one point, i told him to buy you a pumpkin spice latte and uggs because you're a common white girl and that's how he should get you in bed
Not remembering where I left my grinder before vacation #stonerproblems
It will be interesting
Isn't that your life's motto?
Despite popular belief cocaine is not a good pre-workout
I wouldn't hate if he could handle a sex only type of ship. I really don't want to use the word "relation" in front of that.
That butt dial turned into a booty call.
Randomize
