guy picked up a cops taser, thing shot him in the neck, he went down and pissed himself, cop started laughing and hasnt called an ambulance.
i just peed in a port a potty and wiped with my credit card statement. fuck yeah!
"tonights gonna be a goodnight" was blasting at the club while i was screaming "NO ITS NOT" and crying. How do you think it went?
I made a google map for "places I got blow jobs"
if im not pregnant im gonna be so pissed for spending the money from my weed fund on the test
wow, a mother in the making
She just ended a sentence with "and he doesn't even mind my herpes..."
There was a suspicious looking plate that suggests I may have eaten salad with gravy
thanks. im glad you find me better in your comparison between me and fat girl porn.
The bellhop gave us weed in our keycard envelop. We went down to tip him and he apparently never gets that so he just gave us more weed. Kentucky is strange
Please. That's just a patriotism boner. I watched Michael phelps win another medal and had to change my underwear.
Its a holy bong. We had to bless the holy bong water.
She said "we just have chemistry" ... I wanted to say "no, you just have a vagina."
He changed the password on his Netflix account. The break up is official.
It should be perfectly legal to tase anyone not wearing a mask.
I shit myself and fell down the stairs and I’m still finding shit In those pants.
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