apparently i started the naked brigade. and depantsed everyone who wasn't naked. her parents must hate me.
I may or may not have slept in someones apt on your street because they told me I was fun sized like a mini snickers
I hope im prettier
yea, just so you know this whole self-loathing thing is getting pretty fucking annoying
So not only just find my adoption papers that I didnt know about in my parents house, but they say "child shows some signs of mental retardation".
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She wants to practice her harmonica skills on my penis
If I take diet pills with my edibles I'll be a perfect person
I think animal control just caught me smoking a bowl on the back porch. Do they have any say in this matter?? Haha
my pupils became my eyes and i slept with a cloth in my mouth again
I'm confident that their children would come out as 100% authentic rats
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also, there's the possibility of falling 5 feet to your death to make it more exciting
In which case I will yell FIVE SECOND RULE and continue to slam you
You know I ate twenty hot dogs in an hour once.
I am honestly so surprised you are a lesbian.
I want you to get off the plane and get directly into my pants
Good god you suck at this wake up call. Seriously. If I can, after consuming enough vodka to subdue a russian soldier, muster up enough motivation to call you in the morning and send you naked pictures the least you could do is pick up.
I just fucked her in the corner of an ally while holding a large pizza waiting on a pledge for a ride.
I have cats now. Five of them.
Have you considered starting a global domination firm?
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