you might want to delete the history when you're done using the computer at work. did you ever find out what the white balls in your throat were?
she wrote "need hug!" on a sticky note, put it on her back, and passed out on his bed. they're trying to figure out how she got into his room...
She swung at the pinata with crutches
Come to me. Jacob is confessing his love and all I want is a hot dog. With chili. Not love.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My boss walked in on me puking in the urinal while taking a piss. Sunday funday is eroding my last shred of credibility at work.
Also they do not have any come back to america, i miss my fuck buddy cards at Hallmark.
She asked if i could guess "what shape her carpet was". I got it wrong (christmas tree).
you left the hospital looking like the grudge, your mom and I were pushing you in a wheel chair and you yelled peace out fuckers.
barely 48 hours and I've done the dirty on both of my roommates beds before they've even slept in them
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And the prospective student I was showing around had to take care of me.
I woke up with my earring stuck inbetween my tits. Somehow you fucked my earring out and my boobs saved it. I'm pretty impressed with both of us right now.
This guy on the tube is sooooooo high. Eyes are bloodshot and he's licking his headphone cords.
It's my birthday weekend! I'm getting a Brazilian and he's going to fucking Arkansas. Where the fuck are his priorities?
The best part of last night is not remembering half of it
be the chaos you wish to see in the world...
i'm trying to figure out how to respond to that in text
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