"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
so what if he's got a new girlfriend. the guy i'm fucking has an english accent. i win.
Cop gave me a ticket for public drunkedness, and then I convinced him to drive me back to the party
Yo, if someone calls you asking for John Stamos, just go with it.
im eating kix cereal and taking shots by myself. please come hang out with me. im desperate
WTF WHY ARE YOU STILL NOT DOING A BEER BONG?! THE TOILET CLOG CAN WAIT
Apparently one comment in my womens studies class cockblocks yourself for an entire semester.
i knew you were okay when you wanted to eat in the ambulance
Now you know for the next time you go in the basement to wear a helmet
I definitely made out with a high school student last night while his sister and my brother were in the same room. I think we're all traumatized by the situation.
you know it's a good party when the fucking floor caves in. THE FUCKING FLOOR.
We got a lap dance! I touched a boob!
Dude fuck drugs. It's 4am and I'm eating mushroom ravioli fantasizing about jumping on a trampoline
My theme for the night was drink diego drink! Unfortunately Dora was not there to navigate me to the bathroom
party at the soccer house. crumbs in my sexy panties. can't. put. pieces. together.
Randomize
