If God's watching us, we might as well be entertaining
and now there are teeth marks on my dick.
at one point i was feeding a guy sour cream chips and he made me make the "choo choo" noise as they were going in. \ni feel so much closer to him now.\n
Streaking across a girls college rugby game is probably the best, and most painful, decision I've ever made
He had a shameless baby voice when he was talking to my dog. There's no way I'm making it through the night with my clothes on.
I'm using her two yr old as a arm rest while I attempt to feel her up. Somehow she is allowing it. How this transitions to sex should be interesting.
BURNT NIPPLES ARE UNHAPPY NIPPLES.
Nothing says "class act" like eating acid in the middle of a Buffalo Wild Wings
The best part about daylight savings time this weekend is we get an extra hour to be fucked up.
You're right, I'd say my real all time low was when I let that fifteen-year-old feel my boob.
I just moved my 11am hair appointment to 8am so I could blackout at noon. Who am I?
it's unicorns you uncultured swine
as a side note pls kill me
I stole $10 from the guy I hooked up with last night.Not sure why but it was definitely more satisfying.
i'm in a very strange mood rn i'm listening to bruno mars??? am i ok????
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