Just saw a car with license plate GYPSYS that was full of gypsies
Is it possible for Craig Seger to wear a normal suit and not look like an asshole on national tv?
My porch is a mess of peanut butter and tostitos...thanks for that.
I got a Cease & Desist email from NBC for downloading Bruno. I am not going down for gay porn.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You showed the cops outside of the bar your boobs and then decided to go apologize to them. They admitted that the reason they hung out there was because of girls like you.
She calls me Shortcake and bites my ear. Trust me, I'm FINE with bein the secret lesbian lover.
What's a nice way of saying "You fell asleep, and I got bored, so I made out with your brother"?
I fingered her though her window because she couldn't leave
He got punched in the face, dropped his laptop down a flight of stairs, and broke his roommate's lava lamp, getting all the toxic lava goo everywhere. This is why we don't let him get drunk. And yet here we are.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Only he would come to a strip club and talk about an internship with Walt Disney during a lap dance.
How is it that I've hooked up with not one but two guys in the children's section of a bookstore tonight?
I shall welcome him into my body with an open liver and completely lay down all chance of resistance. Sweet Zeus, please take me to Mt. Olympus and share all that is divine. I promise, the secrets will be safe with me
The bachelor party was supposed to stay local but I think were in mexico.
Did I come home in a police car last night? id come downstairs to ask you but i dont think my legs work anymore
I really need to stop having sex.. I haven't been able to get a brush through the back of my hair for a good week and a half
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