she texted him the burrito order while she was puking in the Del Taco parking lot...
Pre-St Patricks Day Log: Threw up across a 14ft radius, this is why the irish dont drink tequila
just weighed my balls on my pocket scale. that high.
the worst part is we had a camera rolling
Did his mom notice it when she saw u guys?
Yes.
I have to watch that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
this is really not the time to pretend we have morals
No. I didn't know. I thought mid afternoon shots meant the day could only get better.
He shaved off his eyebrows. This is not my life.
There are only families here. I'm at the bar alone double fisting drinks. You cannot get any more approachable than I am now.
dude, no lie, I would make out with you in front of them wearing nothing but a rainbow colored speedo
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
this is definitely the first time I've ever had an orgasm and then had potatoes smeared on me within the same hour
I didn't even know this guy existed until he'd had his hands down my pants, so I just went with it.
i’m blowing bubbles in my bloody mary so yeah it’s pretty much time to go
Is this making any sense, because I’m puking and trying to be Philosophical right now
Bro, I live in a constant state of existential dread and moderate ennui. The prospect of cosmic horror doesn’t faze me that much.
Just used a NyQuil cup to take a shot. This night is headed nowhere good.
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