i hope S**** or M***** or someone took note of the fact that i was drinking popov like water and could no longer form sentences. i mean, dont get me wrong i had been thinking about boning R*** long before my sobriety left the picture but the number of reasons not to, outweighed the temptation and without sir robert burnett as R***'s wingman, it would have never happened
He wanted me to blow him while he was playing guitar hero. there will not be a second date
Working on an important paper into the wee hours of the morning, and every time I type the word "situation," I can't help but think of effing Jersey Shore. Those guidos are now ruining my academic life.
I'm pretty sure this isn't my phone, but I do like these nude pics
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I now beleive the Trojan Ecstasy ad "feels like nothing's there". They forgot to add "...cause the condom broke."
my fraternity brothers just had an intervention for me. i either have a problem or am just on some next-level shit, im gonna go with door number 2
i'm not sure if i'm mentally prepared for this.. politeness? proper grammar? book reader ? this is a whole new meaning of the species penis for me.
I had his cock in my mouth and he still wouldn't shut up about Star Wars.
They put me in charge of something. Why the fuck would you look at me and put me in charge of something while i'm double fisting peach mimosas at a baby shower
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm hoping that banging a 24 year old 3 times cancels out banging that freshman on Wednesday
Girl, he can't tell you not to take a bump just because you work tomorrow. You're on a wedding diet, remember?
The parents I babysit for are at this orgy. I need to leave.
He's a real gentleman. At least he tried to flush my closet's handle after he pissed in it.
So now I know what having sex while surrounded by chickens feels like.
ANIME MEN ARE MAKING ME QUESTION MY SEXUALITY AGAIN
Randomize