Driving out to Plano is like driving away from your twenties
Woman walking into toby keith concert: 8 months pregnant, black eye, shirt on that has a picture of a boot and the words "we'll put a boot up your ass" with an american flag printed over--the sleeves were ripped off and she had a camo cowboy hat. Greatest thing I've ever seen.
So then I sent a pic msg of the Magnum XL box to her friend
Because of no shave november, it's no boys december... pay back
You are beautiful! I got thrown out of a bar tonight for throwing my shoe. It was at my sister, I don't know why they were mad. I know her.
She kept telling me to calm down. I was on the floor with my eyes shut, not moving. In levels of calm I was one step above coma patient
The only thing I remember is doing a toddlers and tiaras dance routine onstage. I fucking CURTSIED.
OMG stop. Pretty feet? Sparkle baby!
How am I supposed to be friends with him when there's an exact replica of his dick in my underwear drawer?
I drew a nude short fat middle aged woman today and liked it
It was honestly one of my favorite days in art class except for the 20 min she faced me and kept looking at me and we made eye contact
I spent most of the night trying to drink out of three bottles of beer at once. I don't have to be told the reasons I'm single
I AM CRUING IT IS 93:2 AM AND I AM CYGIN INT BED
The only thing I like when I am high is sex. And Cheez Its. But mostly sex.
Hey I was just wondering if you could go look for my teeth?
My brother just text me asking if I was ready for the blowjob of my life.
LOOK, I was 19, and I made a lot of choices with my crotch which I'm weirdly proud of
Yes dear.
Randomize
