The duggars are the reason premarital sex is ok. Because if you don't have it until marriage you have no self control when it happens. And 19 kids.
Also, I once came to the conclusion after this one boy, that her pleasure condoms are a college boys version of flowers
It smelled like mall pretzels. Of course I investigated.
he broke into my appartment and left me a waffle maker...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just got complimented on my chugging... Car bombs show how good I am at swallowing, they should be my new pickup line.
Yes I have a handle on life. A handle of Svedka.
I do have a life. It just consists of making scarves and chesse straws now
I just remembered something. Did we really all flash the cab driver to get half off?
I actually bought food at McDonald's as an apology for what I was about to do to their bathroom.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I know you're on a date and I should leave you alone but about twenty minutes ago I realized I haven't been spanked in years so if you're still looking for a birthday present, you know, consider it.
I woke up in a chipotle parking lot with an industrial sized box of condoms and a bag of dounut holes. I need Jesus
If you don't see me at the bar tomorrow night, I was most likely captured by the communists.
Beyoncé wouldn't let anything bad happen here
Can you come unlock the door? I just peed myself on the porch.
I'm eating pizza in the bathtub
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