i just hate vaginas for liking penis's insside them
I want to make a porn site called "girls with daddy issues"
i dont even feel safe using a push mower...that hungover
she ate the whole pudding cup using only her tongue. i'm considering going lesbian for her
The police report said that there were 25 cases of bud light, two hookers fighting in the street, 13 cop cars, and two road blocks, a kid got tazered, another got maced, and over a hundred people in the house
So that means its a bad thing that your dad found it huh?
nope. It turned out i wasnt the drunkest person asleep in tacobell parking lot.
Awkwardly walking by your fuck buddy and waving a casual hi in his direction like nothing has happened is probably the best thing in my life
I left the brick of cheese in your car! Keep it at Moderate Temp! It's my precious!
Is that a question you really want to ask or do you just want to tell you that I can't walk without feeling like my legs are collapsing underneath me
You haven't lived until you've thrown up naked in a hotel room in Fargo while holding your breasts so they don't touch the toilet bowl.
So like if I threw up in my purse is that "don't ever show your face in public again" worthy or just slightly frowned upon
just like fucking own it. stare that cop in the eye and just keep masturbating "yeah motherfucker Im high as shit and this feels great"
Have you forgotten that this whole sexy cop role play started with a comment about my mom?
Do me a favor and scream dirty things at him in a polite sexy, come hither way
one week and then i'm back on the sexual grind. a party is being planned in my vagina's honor
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