Having dinner with my dad, watching the news and some AIDS prevention ad comes on. My dad then kindly informs me that he doesn't enjoy the feel of condoms.
Could guys at least pretend I require some amount of money to be spent before I randomly go down on them?
just accidentally masturbated with tiger balm. best. accident. ever.
We were all singing so you said you were going to play a percussion instrument... the crackers.
To justify your stumbling you just kept yelling 'it's the boat, not the drinks' We hadn't even left the dock yet....
Helped an old lady on crutches throw away her mcdonalds, carried her stuff to the car and helped her get in...most productive cinco de mayo hands down
Blood. All over. Pre coke adventure needs to slow down unless I'm involved
Woke up this morning with a junior police officer sticker over my nipple this morning.
Almost told my boss I was an expert aat swallowing when he questioned my ability to take excedrin,xanax, and a vitamin all at once. It was a medicinal gang bang lubricated by arizona tea.
He should get nipple rings. No homo...I actually don't think there is a way to make it non gay.
Yeah you should have just let that thought go.
I shaved last nite, you should see my cock it looks like a beautiful skyscraper
No my first time having an orgasm with you will not be on face time
I AM BEING ACCOSTED BY A HUMMING BIRD
I AM IN MILD DISTRESS
Even with help how did you paint a bullseye around your asshole?
Please don't fuck the professor. We both know that won't end well.
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