apparently i started the naked brigade. and depantsed everyone who wasn't naked. her parents must hate me.
He said i was a degenerate twofaced catholic slut and a grade a bitch. Quite complimentary really. i guess i shouldn't insult the red wings
she says it's "been amazing lately"
i think basically because i hate her so much i'm trying to break her in half
When my girlfriend drinks sangria it's like winning the vagina lottery
i was quietly enjoying my waffles when he came downstairs naked, kissed me on the forehead, and thanked me for the night before. i didnt even know anyone stayed over.
DRUNK CANOEING
Please text me if you survive.
LAND HO BITCH
don't you dare blame getting arrested on me. you sugested we play the penis game and we all know I'm a strong competitor
Yes. No, I'm basically a superhero but with drugs. I'm robin hood. I steal from the rich (insurance and drug companies) and give to the poor (everyone I know).
Judging by the progress I've made since I woke up (none) I'm thinking this hangover may keep me in bed.
i refuse to sex anyone who doesn't get my lord of the rings references. no exceptions.
So my new thing apparently is getting wasted, showing people my slytherin socks and convincing them I'm slytherin..because why not
And also ice skating can blow me. Goodnight, love you!
You casually put your finger in my ass and other people are weird..
lol hangovers are for mortals.
I had to take on your role as drunk idiot....I have no idea how you do it so well and so regularly. That shit is exhausting.
Randomize
