I didn't think it was possible for the human body to be physically dependant on weed until I moved in with this kid
you were sitting on the floor eating oats. how should i react?
We got back together. The pastures weren't greener on the other side, the dicks were just smaller
Well you wanna do it now or later? I've had three shots and I'm listening to journey by myself. Emotionally there is no better prime time than right now.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The guy who bit me so hard two nights ago that I had to put Neosporin on my nipple and the guy in my bed right now are two different people. Help
He made me brush his hair afterwards because it made him feel like a ken Barbie.
God I hope the sex was good.
I need Mexican food. Like, I'd take it through a needle at this point. It's totally worth the track marks.
It's the happiest looking penis I've ever seen. It should have a top hat and a spectacle on and soft shoe across the room with a cane. He's a cheery little feller.
I just saw my 7th grade teacher at the club. We had a pretty good talk over drinks. Turns out we both like dancing on tables.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah i just finished watching someone play ping pong with his penis it didn't fully register until after a few seconds
I'm sending midget strippers dressed as bull fighters with mini bottles of 1800 to your house. Already made the call. Jer is going halves on it. Can't be stopped! Won't be stopped!
At this point, I wouldn't be surprised if he laughs at all of our attempts to keep him sober.
Goddamn it. Hes got me addicted to his penis
my dad just built a flame thrower.. you should probably get here
I guess I’m only into threesomes at Halloween, because I just woke up next to “Marilyn Monroe” and “Joe DiMaggio” in their condo
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