last night this guy was hitting on me by showing me the famous people he had in his contacts on his cell... when he asked me if i knew lindsay lohan, i said "whose that? sounds asian"
four loko is apparently banned in the us. so i think its time for us to stock up. i already emailed them about buying them in bulk
you were sitting on the floor eating oats. how should i react?
The only reason I give him head is because I know i'll get a back rub.
wow.
But it's a REALLY good back rub.
I do remember getting hit in the face by an ugly one because she thought I was blowing on her butthole.
She's either too fat to type, hammered or has terrible spelling.
There's a girl in the bathroom crying about something having to do with cream cheese.
Again??? Now we can't ever fucking go there again STOP PEEING IN FOYERS
I got back and Katie was asleep holding a burrito. I woke her up and she ate it and passed back out.
I just masturbated in the tanning bed stoned. Best decision of my life
I'm a grown ass woman, I need to get fucked
I found a Trump-humping republican virgin born on the goddamn Fourth of July. I NEED to hate-fuck him.
Every time Brady gets sacked I cum a little...
She made me undress her with my teeth...explains the button in my shit this morning...
so i just realized the reason you didn't answer my call last night is because the remote isn't a phone.
Randomize
