oh my god I didn't know your sister was this good at french kissing
Im partying with a unicorn. You don't even know.
She is a fish and this place is a barrel. I can play this game.
i just rememebered i spent like 5 minutes on the ground warming some chicks toes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We fed your dog hot wings then gave it some Bud light to drink. You're right. Dogs are fun.
Well on a positive note, crystal light now comes in margarita flavor
I know. My only sports are biking to buy drugs and running from the police.
I know it I should, but it's kinda nice. It's smells like unbridled enthusiasm and copious amounts of melt your face off sex.
I have dibs on his crisis of faith.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
we somehow managed to fit a llama, a stripper pole and a hayride all into the same day.
LISTEN TO ME! GAY. FIREFIGHTER. They are the most rare and precious kind of gay. The kind little gays dream of. It needs to happen.
Nothing says besties like laying naked in bed hungover arguing over who is getting the pants
Will you fuck me while I eat my burrito though? I'm kind of hungry.
Also you can't just sext a Michelle quote from Full House.
My brothers dog was hit by a car and died. They're really sad about it.
But they're having a baby! It's like a dog only 40 billion times worse!
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