I'm gunna smoke cigs today. I feel like I'm in that powerful and gritty mood which requires them
arkansas has a gas station called kum and go....story of my life
Gentlemen...shes not going to tie her self to the table...
We had sex in his tahoe, talked about how we don't love each other and then high fived twice. Best Day Ever
my dentist asked me why my tooth was chipped, i told him i couldn't remember. i think he understands.
Totalylr drunk. Coveredc in cryola marker. Loving it. Straight men everywhere. Don't be surprises when I'm pregbat romorrowwwww
i woke up to banging and pieces of ceiling falling on my face
You crawled everywhere and rolled in ice cream. No more vodka for a month.
Cut a hole in the crotch of my onesie so we could have sex without me getting cold. Best decision of my life.
It's a fucking menopause festival down here at the strike zone
I guess I'll just chalk it up as a learning experience and a lot of great sex.
rollerskate sex sounded like a good idea...
dude his girlfriend left the meanest shit just marinating in our toilet. I'm gonna have to snap chat this out, theres no other option. prepare yourself
Sorry I punched you in the throat. You got in my way. You understand.
She deleted me on Facebook. I think it's safe to say that she knows I fucked him now.
Randomize
