I thnk I just saw a monkey walking a drunk guy.
the only good thing about these hospital visits are the free pregnancy tests
You can't have your penis and eat it, too.
The only reason anyone found out he threw up is because everyone heard it sizzle the bonfire out.
So did u puke in his bathroom or all over his Olympic medals? Please say medals...
I totally cried the whole time and then screamed out my new therapists name....
Apprently after I bit that bouncer, it all went down hill.
Halloween night fail: My boob sweat from keeping my phone in my bra caused the front screen to stop working from water damage.
Dude if her licking my face hammered isn't love I don't really want to know what love is.
Thats Poetry
Think of something healthy and responsible. Now think of the exact opposite, let's do the latter
Pregnancy test = positive. Hope you still have our old guess who game 'cause daddy elimination begins now.
Same I threw up in 3 different cities already today
How the hell could he be confused. He had a naked girl running to him. I feel like he would enjoy that.
Because bro, I don't want your dick being touched mid conversation.
He said "I can't believe I had sex with a cat lady". Am I flattered or is this a new low?
Randomize
