Obv we're gonna bbm each other in bed
I had to get a ride home from that girl that slept with 3/4 of the band
i take joy in having bigger boobs than others
GO HOME AND LIKE EVERYTHING ON COLT'S FACEBOOK UNTIL 2007.
Wtf it's a Friday night?
PRIORITIZE.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he drank a monster margarita at dinner. had to ask me if it was dollars or minutes that ended in 60.
I just dropped off shoes at Mike's hotel. The chick he hooked up with last night stole his phone and shoes.
you covered his dog in toothpaste. safe to say hes not gonna call you.
the old man that you threw the shoe at says "hi" and many rude words...
My bank account got hacked so he showed up with a 6 pack wearing a superman cape to cheer me up and you question why I love him?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Mom and I shoplifted today. Her idea.
Retirement sounds fun.
just passed the gas station where we took pregnancy tests. memories.
Sorry I crashed a riding mower into your garage door. No hard feelings??
I'm going to make a stack of pancakes and fuck it. Right now.
another side note: i'm officially selling my underwear on the internet
They're doing CPR to someone in the middle of Victoria's Secret. Way to block the undies, damnit!
Randomize