So she puts out... but it wasn't worth it
I wish I could rss feed the hooker ads on craigslist because it looks suspicious that I check craigslist every hour.
in case you havent found it already in honor of Toy story 3 we wrote ANDY on the bottom of your foot while you were passed out on the couch.
She fell down the stairs and hit her head on the concrete. Then she stood up, flashed us and stumbled away. I forgot to get her number..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i'm not entirely sure that 'not getting kicked out of the bar until it got dark' really classifies as 'doing better'
My ex came to my place while I was gone. Random things he took: snow shoes, my laundry quarters, a decorative picture, all my condiments, the container that held my rice and a sticker off my wallet. Then left a note saying he watered my plants and fed my cats. What. The. Fuck.
I WOKE UP IN A FUCKING DOG BED HOW DO YOU THINK I FEEL
I just did the walk of shame in monkey slippers in the snow
Teach me the song of your people
I'm studying. And by studying I mean I am laying on my floor drinking boones farm alone. Last two weeks. Fuck it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You do it and I'll burn these mermaid pants so help me God.
We watched ESPN, hooked up, got waffles. You know, a typical weekend.
I DIDN'T WATCH THE PILLSBURY DOUGH BOY PORN!!!!
One of the guys just came in and goes "i walked all the way home with a pumpkin". Night just got better.
2 weeks shy of 25 and all I’m wishing for is a secret admirer who pulls my trash cans to the curb Wednesday morning for me because I always forget to Tuesday’s nights thanks to it being dollar draft night at the local bar
as a lesbian i'd like to thank joe biden and also america for giving us this absolute MILF for a VP
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