Why does lindsey know I was naked in the kitchen?
Bring your kids so they can distract our kids so we can drink beer in peace.
was it good sex?
i mean it was good for how drunk we were. and for how big the closet was
You opened a bottle of wine with a shoe and a wall last night.
hooked up with the gay kid & his friend's mom told me "you know he has a identical twin brother whose straight, right?"
I woke up at 6am to a knock and a naked guy at my window.
If you call getting home safe by sprinting down Spanish Harlem barefoot still rolling then ya I made it
Dang. We need a girls trip ASAP. Preferably in a country who has even lower standards than us on a Friday night.
How drunk do you guys plan on getting?
We wrote our addresses on our arms for the cab driver, what do you think?
Nah I think he's a bit weirded out I worked out where he lives from a Facebook photo
After last night I am convinced that you are the human embodiment of alcoholism and bad decisions.
If he ever pulls my hair again, I'm going to conveniently have lock jaw. Then he can decide whether pain during sex is still fucking appealing.
Arrived home from picking Mom and Nana up at the airport to find Marc buck ass nude beneath the Christmas tree. Nana says she always knew I was queer.
Look. All I'm saying is that if the USWNT can win a shit ton of medals and have two gay love stories with happy endings, there's still hope in this world
Is 6 weeks really a benchmark now?
Ask me in 6 more weeks, when they're in a bisexual polycule.
Randomize
