yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
i just smoke outta the biggest bowl i've ever seen. the kid was totally compensating for a tiny weeenie.
may or may not have recieved head in the car before we came in.
First straight guy ever blown in a Prius. Congrats.
You were in my dream and you got the lyrics to lollipop tattooed on your chest. Don't get it, it wasnt that cool.
You were pretty fucked up... decided playing hopscotch down the stairs was an excellent idea.. it was extremely entertaining
I mean, once you help another girl drunker than you zip her jeans you can't help but be friends after that
Nope. If I'm going to drive an hour to fuck a teacher, it will NOT be missionary thats for damn sure.
My asshole is basically a geyser at this point. Minus the excitement. Plus blood.
Worse: texted mom-in-law by mistake that I sharted.
Worser: she offered to clean me up
be right there i have to get my cape
Nothing more ironic than raw dogging some random Asian hottie last night and then doing the walk of shame home from her place mixed in with the participants of the AIDS walk
There I was, puking into the toilet, and he was rubbing my feet, buck naked. I feel like a drunk Disney princess.
I'M TOO HORNY FOR GRAMMAR!!!
We're on our way. We couldn't find our clothes this morning, so we're driving your car half naked. You owe me a cigarette.
there is such a gross feeling of satisfaction when the married guy i used to hook up with likes my facebook status.
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