he clicked a button a stirrups came down from the ceiling... if I don't come home by sunday, report me.
You threw up in a Dixie cup last night. Oddly, you just gained major points in my book for that.
She had a boyfriend but was all over this drunk guy that she just met..she said she loved him and then puked all over him.
Remember middle school health class where we used to say that when we lost our vcards we would be on the pill, using a condom, and have had our partners tested first? We were so optimistic.
fun fact #6 about tuesday nights: giving head with two 40s taped to your hands is not as easy as you would think
She didn't need to know her brother was thrown out of a bar for getting head on the dance floor. You're a shit head.
Not blacking out at our finals party is my Everest
I was mid hand job and stopped me because he wanted to "connect" which meant putting his thumb in between my eyebrows and a hand over my heart and closing our eyes...
I woke up last night a kitchen floor with my shirt off and I love America written on my leg in eye liner
can we take a moment to remember my theory on 'your tongue is a snake that lives in your mouth' because we reached a whole new level of high
I made my uber driver take a pit stop between clubs so we could restock on Xanax. #priorities
Yes. Ice cream tacos are an important aspect in the bridge of friendship
Leaves on the ground. Coffee in one hand and your man in my other. Lovely fall morning.
Coffee's working. Just killed a fly with my bare hands.\nFuck with me.
"WHAT IS THIS LESBIAN MADNESS"
Randomize
