Dude, she's so old there's a chalk outline where her reproductive organs used to be.
i have received so many congratulations texts this morning. sleeping with him really was a good decision.
since i'm not going, you must continue my tradition of flashing every person there.
Doubtful. That seems irresponsible. The 4th will kill you if you stopped drinking until then. Let's think logically.
we should drop off a car at the police station before going out tonight so we can drive home in the morning
i feel like my tongue has its own mouth, and that mouth just bit its tongue and is clenching its teeth.
Is it wrong I want to seduce my ex to prove the point to his current gf he's an ass?
We're snowed in with only two condoms. This will literally be valentines day russian roullette.
I don't know. I wanna do you but I also want a cheeseburger.
I gave three different guys a boner at the same time last night, and none of them are in the same city as I am. That's achievement.
Truth be told it's significantly easier to get over someone when they file a police report on you
Apparently I'm some kind of sexual camel.
I asked him if we could have sex sometime and he sent me a three page long text about his feelings for me. that's the only possible situation I've ever run into where a "k" response would have been more appropriate.
I just found your "it's drinking time" note in my chem notes. Why did this never happen??
I was waiting for you to find it...I'll be over in 5
Goat in kitchen.....explanation?....
Randomize
