You pointed at his crotch then made a thrusting motion. I think it's safe to say every guy at my college loves you.
My gynecologist just commented on how well my vagina was waxed
The water bill last month was outrageous. We have got to stop fucking for hours in the shower
I was going through my paperwork and I found the lifetime warranty card for my 14" dildo. I saved it. You know, just in case.
Using his name makes it all too personal. I refuse to get attached to this one. This is all about ass. He doesn't get a name.
She was mad I came so fast. I was like, It's the Olympics! Fastest time wins! We can train you in the offseason.
I used a jello pudding cup as a shot chaser last night. I'm the Bill Cosby of alcoholics
As the bouncer was escorting you out, you yelled "keep your filthy dick beaters off me!"
I tolerate his mediocre drunk sex for the mind blowing morning sex. More than worth it.
Is it wrong that I get drunk and let him eat me out then fall asleep? He offers me so much and yet I do nothing. I feel like a republican.
We had sex and I never took my mets hat off... I feel like Duda knows and approves.
I can't believe he's mad at you for not remembering your fake anniversary.
Your skill with memes is vaguely frightening
In theory, it seemed like it would work.
I made her pull the car over 5 times to puke because she was going to fast, apparently she was only going 30mph...
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