if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
I even made an effort to dress like a conservative young lady who doesnt black out and throw up in her bed regularly today.
You asked the officer if he could bring you to the same jail as T.I.
He showed up to the Seder drunk and tried to convince everyone that he could read Hebrew.
Would the plural word for douche be deese? "Look at these deese bags"?
Are you high?
at wine tasting. Can i cleanse my Palate with a frito?
I can't handle dick pics with conversational captions
wearing the bible to the ABC party, thought you'd appreciate that.
I don't remember where I was but I remembered that I hated everyone there
I cannot be with a girl who won't let me come home on my lunch break, eat spicy ranch and watch Breaking Bad without pants on. #lesbianproblems
I told the person I was on the phone with to hold on while I looked for my phone. I think it's time to stop doing dabs.
I met a gypsy today. She told me my soul animal was an owl and says she will now remember me as "Owl Girl".
Are you awake? I feel like I need to confess my sins to someone not on this side of the country.
I want to die, ON THAT, with that INSIDE ME. ironically, I sense that would be the only time I'd feel alive.
So do I get points for screwing my recently single ex boyfriend and then telling him to go fight for his ex back?
Randomize
