lol you are funny thanks bro I'll take you to a strip club
I don't wanna go to a strip club I'd rather get my boobs free or earn them from a series of good deeds
Ha! What's wrong with that? Hard work deserves compensation. I accept cash, checks, and boobies!
Worst part was I had to fart super bad and didn't want to ruin the room so I farted in a pillow and threw it under the bed.
but the lizard people decide everything anyway
Just took a beer bong out of snuffaluffagus's trunk. Your move
he just told me i make him happier than drugs. that's some serious shit right there
Whats the count minus fat chicks?
You were rubbing your foot on one of your legs and kept saying, "My sock feels like a waterslide!"
I am ina trunk. Iam in a trunnnnnjkk. I hope its yours. Oh manomanomano. Thids better be your trunk
eta to your mouth 5 minutes
Technically my penis started a fight tonight
this year we will have multiple halloween identities. lesbian couple meets brian and stewie
Literally the only clue I have to try and figure out my blackout adventures is a draft on twitter that just says "Mummies alive!"
I shoulda been born a dude. There's too much power in a vagina.
The fact that you screamed, "Alf is my spirit animal!" is proof enough that we're too old for peyote.
Just saw the cop you hooked up with over break. He’s def hotter in uniform.
Tell him to stop shaving his pubes. #Notmyjam
Randomize
