He wanted to take me out and said we could "go huntin in the woods."
remember when you found twisted pleasure condoms in my parents bathroom? theyre gone.
we'll penetrate his innocence with our dicks
I realized courtney is my jiminy cricket but instead of preventing me from telling lies she prevents me from fucking strangers
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Let's just say there's a reason that "suede" rhymes with "laid".
I mean, I'd wanted to go skinny dipping, hook up with him and have sex on a beach, so last night I basically killed 3 birds with one super slutty stone.
Don't blame the cocaine for your eating disorder.
She's clinging to me like a horny koala.
Germany has fetish clubs for everything. We are going to Germany. Germany is our friend.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
do you want me to tag you in the pics from the party?
Hmm. Use your judgment. Bootlicking pics are probably not ok. Otherwise fine.
she's fucked both of my roommates but not me. i feel like I'm not part of the group anymore
I can assure you I didn't go home with a girl, because I woke up on someone's porch
My mom just asked if I've gotten any girls pregnant how is your day going
Sext me about skeletons
Omg. I just remembered my underwear is in my wallet
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