Semen is not good for contacts.
Don't forget: you only show your tits for the good beads. Be judicious.
OH MY GOD I CAN'T WAIT TO BONE YOUR EX BOYFRIEND. HOW AWKWARD IS THIS?
It was my little brother's 14th birthday today. Didn't know what to get him so I just showed him how to use incognito tabs on google chrome.
You put your finger on my lips and told me 'the butt is nature's pocket'.
I don't remember that at all, but I stand by what I said
thanks again for a nice night (and please don't fuck my boss)
Let us bow our heads and pray that I don't throw up in the tub
I remember us getting kicked out of the bar, but neither of us know why. We woke up next to chicken bones on a plate with spoons, and my car has mud all over it including places where feet shouldn't be, like the speakers on the car door.
He must be a special kind of stupid to cheat on a women who works at a funeral home. Does he not understand you can get rid of dead bodies easier than most Americans?
So what you're saying is that The Magic Kingdom is ruining our plans to get laid?
I told my coworker that I'd get him some edibles because he wants to rekindle his marriage. I'd better get some good karma out of this.
I wanna eat mushrooms and cuddle with a million dogs at once. I wanna know what heaven is like
You some how ended up sleeping on one of the beams that run along the ceiling of your house
Third time this week I've caught co workers dry humping. Quarantine really changes people's priorities.
Want to meet at a cool spot and just park like cops side-by-side and you can eat some potatoes and I can smoke a cigarette in your face?
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