how come the more i say "don't get it in my eyes," the more gets in my eyes
I'm not saying I want a booty call. I just want what Cory and Topanga had.
thanks for stopping by when you did. making a meatball quesadilla while high was a bad choice
full cup flip cup was not exactly the reason I wanted to tell the cops when I was sleeping on the curb
My vagina senses are tingling. I know your here.
For a limited time only, free special muffin with the referral of a loyal dro customer! Have it for breakfast and be happy off your ass all day! Guaranteed! New member must buy at least an eighth. Oh and O's are on sale for 280.
You. Win. At. Life.
So on a scale of 1 to Friendship-Over, how mad would you be if a rando I brought home sharted on the shag carpet in the living room?
Can we just talk about how the only thing I have on my camera from this weekend is a video of you putting your whole fist in your mouth hahahha
Your next boyfriend should be from MENSA...you're so smart, it's intimidating as fuck. My penis retracted in fear.
Well the streak is over, I saw a penis today
I'm very impressed by your ability to explain a story about your fiery snatch solely in emojis. props.
There is a reason my most meaningful relationship since 2012 has been with Duracel...
You peed all over his floor and had a bottle popped in your ass when you passed out. Don't tell me I'm "still living in my college days"
You know you're an adult when you start planning your hookup a week in advance
In other news, I tore a tendon in my hand from giving my boyfriend handjobs so that's how my day is going
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