a smallpox vaccine scar is like a lower back tattoo.
I have demons in me.
she looks like luggage that fell from a plane
then they caught me trying to hide the turtle in the fridge
They all laughed at me when I bought that necklace from Life Alert. Who's laughing now?
I cNt phones. tingles in my fingles. jingles
I mean there is a rehab there so its gotta be a good time
Yea I've gotten enough hickeys in my life to know what I'd look like with a neck tattoo. I think I'm getting a neck tattoo.
Cute boy and deffffff wearing a HS shirt. I am getting too old to be inaccurate.
I met his dad. Turns out he was a one nighter from the nurses conference in Vegas. Not sure how to handle this one.
Clearly, you already have. Both of them.
I thought I was heading girls talk. It was the toilet. Like put my ear to it
wow, being home for Xmas is freaking weird on tinder. I went to high school with everyone I'm matching... The fact that this many jocks like me now is a huge ego boost from my lack of glory days.
...and I'm done. I just matched two boys I used to babysit without realizing it.
He's like a computer from 2001 in a 2014 world. It just doesn't work. Lots of glitches.
He congratulated me by offering up free orgasms.. I told him I also had a birthday last month we needed to celebrate.. He was there in ten minutes.
WHAT THE FUCK DREAM ME
I'M GONNA PUNCH THAT BITCH THE FUCK DID SHE THINK SHE WAS DOIN
Randomize
