drinking warm bud heavies i found in the garage and googling how to tell the gosselin kids apart.
she's walking around the room telling people she can make the room move with her mind and then she shakes her head really fast yelling 'see?!'
You know, I really only think drinking is a problem if you're not good at it.
having to delete all your hookups stored in your phone as first name followed by frat/bar after they've graduated is such a bittersweet feeling
While he was going down his phone rang and he answered saying I'll call you later I'm eating.
She told me she needed to clarify that we are not fuck buddies, we are best friends that have sex once in a while
She had a baby and now works at Hooters. She is the poster child for peaking in high school.
Fell in the ditch running from the pizza guy I stole the pizza from. If you are still at my house come find me, pretty sure I need stitches.
What can I say, your life is charmed. I'm on the couch trying to decide whether or not to puke again.
So. Much. Sex. I feel like i ran a marathon then someone kicked me in the vagina. Soo worth it
Update: it wasn't just our driver. This ticket confirms that the Royal Oak PD also found our behavior on the party bus to be "Lewd and Indecent."
I may puke in class so I'm excited to see how that goes
I yelled out look at all those hickeys. And then gave her boyfriend a high five
Last night I dreamt that I sold my car and used the money to have wheels surgically implanted in my feet and legs so I became a human heely and I just rolled everywhere
Pregnancy has ruined porn for me. I can't watch a hot chick get it on without being jealous of her perfectly waxed shit. I can't even see my shit.
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