so this guy on craigslist is offering a case of beer to shave his back. i think i'm gonna take him up on it.
somehow writing 'not a skank' on yur boobs doesn't really make you look less skanky...
I made $300 today by selling pizza @ $4 a slice to nerds who refuse to leave the library. God I love finals time
I mean I woke up wearing my bathing suit which blows my mind
I cant help but love a girl who informs me of the pregnancy test results by emailing me a YouTube clip of Barney Stinsons not a fathers day speech.
This isnt meant to be as creepy as it sounds, but do you seriously want a lock of the hair I cut off?
In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
no, she just came home, mumbled about being a gerbil out of water then ate half cooked chicken nuggets.. normal night
I'll always remember 2012 as the year I hooked up with countless girls who had the sides of their heads shaved.
HE GAVE ME ONE OF HIS BEERS.
YOU'RE THE CHOSEN ONE.
Have you ever just woke up in the morning and felt pregnant
I shotgunned a beer immediately puked and rallied. And by rallied I mean had sex in the bathroom after he held my hair.
What a gentleman.
I ended up sleeping on a park bench. Never using Tinder again.
His name was toto. That should have been my red flag
Have you ever looked at someone and thought…oh honey, you're too pretty for an ankle monitor
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