doesn't he have a GF?
that just means you have to try harder.
i didn't have to try TOO hard, just told him i didn't want to know his name or...
why did i save someone in my phone as corn dildo?
I am at the gas station and there is a whole amish family here I'm not sure why the amish need gas but I think its worth investigating
The dean held back my hair as I was puking after graduation. That means so much more than a diploma and a handshake.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
drunk tastebuds have low standards.
Awkward interaction of the day: Staring at some guy trying out if he is or is not the guy that woke me up yesterday by getting arrested in front of my apartment.
I could tell by the Randy 'Machoman' Savage "hey brother" that you were beyond inebriated
not to be a dick but do you remember the names of all your friends i made out with after we broke up?
WHAT? When did I ever refer to one of my past hookups as "the rainforest guy"?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
New game I thought of while bored on the train. Anytime I get a text from an ex, I will randomly text a different ex. It's like a less charitable version of pay it forward.
I forgot I did whipits. Probably because my brain cells were killed from the whipits
He had a drawn-on fu manchu and now my vagina has one too.
Please remind me next time not to call the ex who cheated on me to cry about the ex who forgave me for putting him in prison. It would be much appreciated.
I woke up with a twisted ankle and was covered in lube. Not entirely sure what happened last night
I've had sex with three people who have this birthday.
Randomize