hipster in red sally jessy raphael glasses inside. kick her.
I'm sorry..where i come from learning how to exploit a wealthy middle aged man is a right of passage
i wanted to sleep on a waterbed so i filled up my bathtub so i could fall asleep in it...
i paused nhl 10 while i jerked off and it was like a crowd was cheering me on
don't you miss freshman year when you could get away with "but i've never given a bj before..."
she won't take no for an answer... no matter what language i said it in
RJ thinks I should put one of the muffins in my vagina. Good idea or bad idea?
If a "boob" guy and an "ass" guy are discussing which you are better qualified for....just let them
Step 1: drink. 2: drink more. 3: go for it. 4a: success. 4b: drink more. 5. drink. 6. go for other girls. 7. drink more. Sound good?
Frozen pudding on a popsicle stick. Bill Cosby would be so proud of drunk me.
We're gonna go drive around campus and throw water balloons at all the drunk bitches wobbling around, wanna come?
There was probably a tattoo above her soulless vagina that read 'it's a trap!' Yet you ignored it
He called some chick he used to fuck for cash to get food delivered to cheer me up
Is kiddo a correct name to call someone who you stuck your dick in?
Next thing I know her tits are out on my desk. It was straight out of a porno. What was I supposed to do I’m not made of stone
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