That girl really should ne nicer to her vagina. It's not a playground.
Apparently hers is a theme park.
My doctor literally wrote on the script NO SEX
Yeah, but there's no serving sizes for dick.
She's going to get preggers, drop out of school, and end up working at mcdonalds. Great for our mcdoubles habit but bad for her future.
My phone now knows what I type and it prompts me with frequently used words. And anytime I use "and" and hit the space key two of the words are "unicorn" and "sausage"
The police report said that there were 25 cases of bud light, two hookers fighting in the street, 13 cop cars, and two road blocks, a kid got tazered, another got maced, and over a hundred people in the house
So that means its a bad thing that your dad found it huh?
Don't feel bad, we're professionals and we just housed burgers in burger king singing I believe I can fly
Going to an AA meeting just so I can fuck him...That's dedication
Whenever I think to myself, "I don't work for a bunch of hours"... It's shot time?
Then, she put flavored warming oil on my dick and was amazed when something she bought FROM SPENCER'S almost burned my dick off.
Let's fuck under the stars. And by under the stars I mean in my bed underneath my glow in the dark star stickers.
I'm so drunk and angry about the Michigan game the fact of my relationship being over doesn't matter
Did I turn a man straight...??
Yes!
Its only once in a life time you get to pick your vcard swiper up from jail
How is there a hawk inside this house? More importantly how the hell is he handling it without any gear?
Randomize
