I meant the "stage" gay, Not the "bend me over and call me Gary" gay.
were with a gay guy with a minnesota accent. think about how funny that sounds.
I hate myself for knowing the words to party in the USA.
I just used my 7th grade year book to figure out who I hooked up with last night. Being home is magical.
only my mom would pack illegal paraphernalia in a care package..
I don't know if this beer pong partnership can last if you refuse to look me in the eye when we make sweet sweet clutch cup at the same time.
Just wanted to remind you that you literally cut the underwear off a man.
Just had to masturbate in the bathroom because mom changed my room into a "knitting" room. I hate coming home.
I learn from experience and I experienced what it would be like to completely lose my mind and then wake up with a stab wound.
My cast smells like cheese steak rolls
Every time I download Tinder again, I hate myself a little more.
I was eating pickles straight from a jar, contemplating doing something productive. What did I miss?
I told him we can’t see each other today because absence makes the heart grow fonder but mostly I just need to rest my vag
I woke up with a pube in my teeth...I'm disturbed cause we're both clean shaven
I think drunk me saved him in my phone as "beautiful man" to play a joke on sober me
Randomize
