We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
But he was like 75 and lives right near mom and dad. Not a threat at all.
Why wouldn't u just let me ride the washing machine
I think I'm finally maturing. I'm happy he found someone. Good for him. I sincerely hope she doesn't choke on his tiny penis.
As far as figuring life out your talking to a guy that's alternating text messages between his baby mama and a drunk bitch I met tailgating. My best advice is don't worry about shit out of your control and always and I really mean ALWAYS wear a condom.
also I woke up naked and covered in water but nobody can explain that part.
She told me she's into girls now. I told her there would be a full bottle of jäger and an empty bed here Friday.
I approve. Last time I was there, I left E's room to get a drink of water. Found M sitting on the kitchen counter in his boxers hammered and eating a banana. He proceeded to feed me the rest of his banana then went to bed with the lights on. You two will be great.
Life is so difficult sometimes. Can you imagine? Going through life, constantly creating boners everywhere you go.
I just set a reminder on my phone to get star spangled hammered this weekend.
you called me drunk last night to talk about summoning sex demons with magic WTF
for not the first time in my life, my clothes are covered in piss and i'm standing in line waiting to buy pedialyte at a convenience store
drinks after work?
that question mark offends me.
I miss my teeeeeeeeth. They're in a bag in my hand.
it's the international house of making me almost fucking shit myself
I wish I could open myself up and check on my liver. Make sure it's hanging on. Ya know?
Randomize
