I think she heard me call her a fat skank. But she was to be fair.
I texted him about a book we both like. I was expecting a "ya great book... let's bone" response. It didn't work
"tonights gonna be a goodnight" was blasting at the club while i was screaming "NO ITS NOT" and crying. How do you think it went?
Correct me if I'm wrong, but I did not stop moving last night. If tequila gives me that extra push to have an active lifestyle, so be it.
i will pay you if you can come get me. he just suggested that we would have a hockey themed wedding.
His drunk text included an attempt at quoting a Nyquil bottle in MLA format
Please tell me you're throwing the cats into this foot of snow.
They'd unbutton the overalls with their lesbian-tongues. It wouldn't even be a problem.
She had caution tape on her head and she blew me.
drunk caitlyn doesn't know how to work gmail. so know an email has been sent to the entire campus with a picture of me naked eating a bagel attached.
And now I'm drinking leftover wine in the grad lounge because fuck my life
there's a photo set of like seven dicks covered in glitter....i don't know what to do
Woman at starbucks on her computer with a garbage bag of popcorn and a bottle of lotion. Where are you coming from?!
dont know if she was trying to start a lawnmower or jerk me off. still wasnt to bad though
I love how u said nothing about the sidewalk sex but refused shower sex
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