Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
turns out the website for Dick's Sporting goods is not "dicks.com". It was a win either way.
Just remembered I hit myself in the face with a bottle then did the nose test and decided I was still good. Don't think anyone noticed.
She suggested that I come visit her in Europe and hook up with the heteroflexible Korean who sits next to her in class. Polylove is the best love.
You stuck a chicken finger in that stripper's clevage and said "Keep this warm for me.
holy shit thats the most artistic dick pic ever
Do not deep throat a rocket pop, it WILL go into your lungs, and you may die.
Can't tonight. I'm supposed to get drugs for some college kids. Just doin my part in helping to enlight america's future
Is eating fries while lying on the floor bad for you?
If I choke and die at least I will have been doing something I love
Was so close to hoppin on it but then I realize it's not a dick and I needed to keep walking. Primal instincts.
You gave me a bottle of tequila and introduced me to a ginger named cowboy. I actually love you.
I appreciate the fact that you sent me a snapchat of your dick soaking in a cup of water.
Everyone I slept with in 2016 is getting a Christmas card from me. Because I'm an adult.
I am a unicorn in a field of flowers, you asshole.
The guy in the cage next to me is having phone sex. His girlfriend is in College Library. Why is my life ridiculous.
Randomize
