Do you need to be saved?
No I think I'm God
Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
i know you like preteen girls so i'm gonna offer you some advice...dump a bucket of glitter on yourself and walk into the sunlight. they will come running.
I wonder what a non-hungover friday at work is like
I appreciate the offer. Swallowing pride is much like swallowing cum, difficult and unpleasant
you had a pretty long talk with your shrooms in attempt to make them not give you a bad trip, it failed
Hey could you buy me 2 bottles of arbor mist? I'm trying to get laid tonight
I may hire someone just to sell my family the drugs they keep asking me for. It's cutting into my doing drugs time.
Just saw a guy with two baby turtles sneaking into the building
I drank enough to tranq a steed. You really missed out
Just found out I made out with the 40 year old Captain of the boat at the barge party. On the bright side he let me drive the boat so at least there's that.
If you get any calls give me a heads up. Im drinking rum in my underwear on the back porch.
I just had sex in the footy bunny pajamas my mom bought me for christmas. Tis the season
What was my myspace song when I went away to rehab?
I was told I look like trouble once and that was by a fireman at the sex show. I was carrying two beers and a penis pinata.
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