put your party hat on. and by party hat I mean no panties
No, I'm not okay. Girls are wearing BUMPITS here.
Avril Lavigne as a judge on Idol wearing devil ears. it's like every boner you ever had in 2002 just came true.
The guy that just projectile vomited over the balcony is now going down to find the pill he just puked up. He said he wasn't about to waste $15.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm making tacos. Give me one good reason why we shouldn't be high while eating those tacos.
I'm sure that's not what the inventers of the Turkey baster had in mind, but that's what I had in mine.
Hey thanks again for rolling me that blunt necklace. It was amazing.
bong water from a few floors above me just splashed onto my face when i was looking out the window. Happy 4/21 to me
FYI, your girlfriend is on her way to the ER. She tried to balance a bottle of jack on her chest. Smashed toes, blood all over patio. Call her, kinda funny though.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I'm thinking next semester you should be my own personal maid, nurse, masseuse and chef in exchange for free lodging, any food you can find, and unlimited access to my reproductive organs.
Speaking of fellatio on fictional characters, the Stay Puft Marshmallow Man would be a delicious blowjob.
i had an epiphany while laying on the driveway for 5 hours yesterday.
i realized i waste a lot of time
You're going to be mad because I got baked, but not that mad because I'm bringing home kfc.
I swear every time I see him he's either dancing or trying to touch people
The prescription the hospital gave me for pain and nausea doubles for my hangovers... Maybe I'll hit up the ER more often
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