i wonder what megan fox's vagina feels like.
Heaven soaked bacon.
i was puking in the toilet, he walked in and to talk to me and started puking in the sink.. Could this be my perfect man??
epic walk of shame this morning involving 2 subway transfers. I need to start sexing locally.
youre totally missing out on eating your boogers right now. my entire face is numb
she was pooping while we were on video chat. new level of love.
Pretty sure a homeless guy just told me to 'lick his balls clean' because I looked at him.
Going to have to start putting down newspaper if puking the bed is going to be a habit
We would have taken you home with us, but you were outside the bar measuring a randoms stream of piss by walking along side it... you said you were only at 32 feet and it still had a couple of grooves to hit.
My eyes feel like they're throwing up and I am the only human on campus
I'm driving while wearing hulk hands
It was over as soon as he asked if he could name my vagina pancake.
my vagina is starting to think like a penis, and I'm not even slightly worried
& he told me that I give the best head ever.. like can I get that on a medal?
Slammed 3 beers and just bowled a 129\nI guess alcohol IS the answer
Like at first he was barely doing anything. So I was like harder and then holy shit he's like going all HULK SMASH on my vagina. I mean it felt fucking awesome. BUT STILL
Randomize