Drunk x Brooklyn = problems getting home. If I don't make it you can have my computer and my bitches. You're welcome.
I may or may not have just irish jigged at a bar. And broken out in a sweat from it. Not a good sign for that marathon yo.
What's the procedure for failed threesomes? Do I friend her on facebook this morning?
I'm gonna have bed sores at the end of this hangover.
just looked at his mug shot... not really my type
Its pretty simple actually, if she texts me either Grr or Rawr it means she is horny and wants to bone. its a perfect system
Judging by his buldge, this guy is huge. just paid steve to follow him into the bathroom and find out. They had a convo about it.
At the bar. Madeline and I totally brought our own pitcher from home because they always run out. Hello alcoholism.
It's probably just the physical manifestation of slut karma. But i of course mean that in the kindest way possible because i love you and respect your choices
But once you explained how to fill cupcakes with semen I realize you were harmless and right on my level.
Our sibling relationship has really blossomed into a wonderful mutual acceptance of sluttyness
He got naked after doing the Ice Water Challenge and it was still enormous. So, yeah, I stayed over.
He started saying the pledge of allegiance so his boner would go down. Merica.
After we hooked up he started to cry and called his mom and told her he wanted to marry me
The internet was right. Snorting muscle relaxers is awful
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