Oh My! A car just drove by me a splashed me with a wave of water. I am drenched and soaking wet!
I am sorry--all I heard is that you are wet.
yes, too bad my tears were being wiped away by tits in my face
you turned your livingroom into a bong?
im pretty sure there are laws against slapping prostitutes
i'm pretty sure there are laws against prostitutes.
My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
Yeah he kicked my ass... He probably wouldnt have hit me as hard though if I wasnt lauging and yelling " I fucked your sister I fucked your sister" over and over again.
apparently they wrote a song entitled "butt slut" about her... im thinking shes not girlfriend material.
Of course my walk of shame coincided with the alumni marathon on campus. But, I did get a thumbs up from the woman handing out water.
What is a reasonable amount of condoms to keep in my condom wallet without it being creepy that I have too many?
She's crying about either her ex boyfriend, her one night stand, or her own puke. None of those is worth the tears.
Oh Julie took your pants off last night, I put your pajama bottoms on, and Rachel took your bra off. It takes a village.
you do realize the next step is naked mud wrestling, right?
Not sure who they are or where we're going but they just bought me 3 tacos so I'm staying.
right after that u started calling me g-force and started trying to bellyslide down his drive way
I am not a whore. I just wanted casual drinking, monogamous sex and occasional McDonald's runs.
Randomize
