im gay
i know
yea but for you.
strike ten. I need to stop drinkng
You know you're hung over when your pose in art class is lying face down on the platform
Ummmm yeah ..,.. All three girlfriends I have right now are chatting with each other at the party...... I'll see you on the other side
1. my parents still have sex. 2. being a screamer runs in the family. 3. so much so that i can tell what number of orgasms she's on. 4.so looks like i'm stuck outside a while
He asked me to coffee and I had no choice but to be honest. So naturally I told him that sobriety and monogomy are not two of my strong suits.
it was all good until he screamed "for fraaannnceee" on his last thrust
Chicken strips. I got my nose broken because of Chicken strips.
I mass texted 4 of you for a booty call. Please reply all when responding so only one of you shows up. Last one is a rotten egg.
So I'm drunk playing pool in a bar with a guy I arrested last week for a DUI...if he recognizes me, shit's gonna get real.
There's cereal in my underwear. Was I in your apartment at any time last night? That's the only logical explanation for this.
I know now that the cab driver can get me a 10 dollar blow job. I'm practically a local.
I know how vodka works Grace. I'm drunk, not stupid.
Regardless of how one feels after a break up, whiskey must be consumed.
I'm not trying to take your husband away from you, but can we have another 3way soon? I'm just desperate for good dick.
Randomize
